So now I am a beekeeper! I
have two hives. I’ve read several
books. I belong to a couple of
beekeeping forums. I even went to a one-day Beekeeper School. I must be an expert!
At least my friends seem to think so. In reality, I know there is a whole lot I
still don’t know. I still don’t even
know if I can keep a hive alive through the dearth months of the Summer, much
less the Winter.
A somewhat hyperactive, maybe even impulsive Friend, called me one
evening in July. His friend had a colony of bees lodged between the roof
and ceiling of his porch. The Homeowner had called a local bee swarm
remover. The professional wanted $300 plus to remove the colony. Homeowner
had felt that the fee was too high. Friend assured Homeowner that I would
be glad to help them get the bees out of the house for free.
As I listened to Friend’s story, a small voice inside me was
saying “NO, don’t do it.” But a louder
voice was saying “What an adventure!” Of
course, the louder voice won out! After
all, I was an expert now, wasn’t I (see above)?
I had even watched several YouTube videos of people catching swarms, so
I should be able to handle this.
I agreed to get the bees if Friend would help and would keep the
bees. I also advised Friend that I can tear apart, but not put back
together. I have had a lot of experience over the years taking things
apart. I’ve also had a lot of experience
attempting to put things back together.
I am definitely better at creating chaos than at creating organization.
Not to worry, Friend reminded me that he has good carpentry skills,
and Homeowner is a cabinet maker. The
two of them will make sure everything is rebuilt and in good order once we have
removed the bees.
Friend found an online store and bought his own beekeeper's outfit
and starter hive. We waited a week for everything to arrive and for
Friend to build and paint the hive.
In the meantime, I built a bee vacuum out of surplus plywood I've
got lying around. I'm not a carpenter, and the bee vacuum looks like
it. There are at least two different thicknesses of plywood. The suction hose does not fit tightly, and
there are a few gaps along the edges.
The key to a bee vacuum is that you want just enough suction to
pull the bees in. Too much suction and you damage or kill the bees as
they bang against the hose or land hard in the box. Hence, my lousy
carpentry was an asset in this instance. There were lots of air leaks.
I was ready for this new adventure. Soon, I would add the title of Bee Swarm Remover
to my resume! Tomorrow I would venture
out and rescue Homeowner’s house from a colony of bees that had invaded their
home.
But for now, it was time to rest and wait for dawn.
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